I’ve said it often enough on here, but I’ll say it once more: i’m not a massive fan of my body. That said, if you asked me whether i’m more comfortable dressed or undressed, I’d choose the latter. Clothes, it seems, or the wrong clothes at least, cling to all the bits I like least – the extra weight around my middle and my bra straps, too – suggesting that my tits are too big, rather than perfect just the way they are.

Which brings me to my point – my tits are so perfect just the way they are that it makes me a massive fan of good underwear. After all, underwear isn’t there to cover the good bits, it’s there to frame them the same way you’d frame an expensive picture (boys, this especially applies to you when you’re hard and wearing nice pants).

There are, however, some people who fail to realise this, namely the shop assistant in John Lewis who tried to sell me a wonderbra so big that I had no cleavage left, and another in a French department store who seemed astonished when I wanted a particular bra in a balconette style – her gripe, it seemed, was that I didn’t need the extra padding the style would afford me – I was, she said, already big enough.

I agree, I wouldn’t want my tits to be any bigger, but nor does that mean that I want every inch of them to be covered in lace, or to wear something so thin that my nipples become the focal point of my look as soon as there’s a slight chill breeze.

I bought new underwear this week, for a mini break I’m going on in December. It’s not for the guy in question, though – it’s purely for me.

Foreplay, in my opinion, isn’t just about the bits where he’s kissing you, stroking you, going down on you … it’s also about the time you spend getting ready for his arrival, showering, drying your hair, sneaking a quick glass of wine while you put your make up on. And choosing my underwear is a huge part of that for me – I feel sexiest just in my underwear and I sometimes wish he knew that – there’s generally an urgency to our fucking that means that often the only time he really gets to see my underwear is when he hands it back to me at the end of an evening.

So, underwear manufacturers – I have a few requests. Yes, we big girls need good support from our bras, but we want them to be pretty and to give good cleavage, too. Secondly, could you please try and make something pretty but affordable than I can buy to put on after sex? I could, of course, just put my knickers back on – that does, after all, have its perks – but I’m not sure that’s the clearest way to indicate that I’m always, always up for a second round.