This year I’m not making any promises about returning to the blog, or to Twitter, in 2018, although both of these things could happen (in the meantime, come find me on Instagram – @sexblogofsorts!). The idea that the gift guide might not happen this year was out of the question though – I start making a list of ideas for it in January and it’s one of the highlights of my festive season.

As with last year, if you have other great suggestions for gifts, especially from independent sellers, please leave them in the comments or hit me up on social media – I *love* discovering new stuff! Let me know too which items on here you particularly like – it helps me to plan next year’s!

1. Little Winter Robin, £7
   Because really – how can you resist those eyes?

2. Kamasutra Pins Set, 20€
Because cute. And sexy. And cute. Plus, racial and sexual diversity. Available as socks, if you’re not a pin person.

3. REN Atlantic Kelp And Microalgae Anti-Fatigue Bath Oil
Of course there was going to be a bath oil. REN stuff is beautifully packaged, non-greasy, but the rose one has always been a tiny bit too floral for me. This is much less divisive, and good for both girls and boys with fancy tastes.

4. Laser Cut Anatomical Heart, $49 CAD
There’s something fascinating, beautiful and also somehow repulsive about anatomy. Whatever it is though, I find it hard to look away from these beautiful paper cuts…

5. Yes Queen Stationery, $32
Strong women and luxury stationery is a fab combination, and these notecards, featuring images of Marie Antoinette, Queen Elizabeth, Cleopatra and Beyoncé would make a great gift for a friend.

6. Concrete Planter Making Kit, £15
Kit gifts can be a total, end-up-in-the-back-of-the-cupboard fail, but concrete? Concrete is *sexy*. This is one I’m really hoping someone buys for me.

7. Good vibes only embroidery, £17.24
Embroidery art always feels really good value to me, because I can’t sew at all, so I’m in awe of the work that goes into it. And there’s so much good stuff in the YesStitchYes shop…

8. Monkey Pants, £40
Is underwear and/or socks a bad gift? I say no. Along with nice hair products, I love getting stuff I’ll actually use. And I love the subtle, but unusual and fun, print on these pants.

9. ‘I Am Bat’, £8.36
Bat falls, without a doubt, into the category of #fictionalcreaturesthatgivemefeelings. I’ll be buying this for every toddler I know this Christmas.

10. Gusbourne Pinot Noir ’15, £25
There’s always wine on the gift guide, but, as a rule, I usually pick something with a fun label. This one lacks that, but it has the novelty value of being an English *red* and it tastes damn good also.

11. Caramelised Pretzels, £3.95
Chin Chin Labs ice cream creations are epic, and while you can’t get the ice-cream delivered to your home, I love the idea of pairing a load of their toppings, including these pretzels but also grilled white chocolate and marmite toast, with a DVD or two, to make an excellent ‘night in’ kit.

12. Another Night In Loose Tee, £28.94
I have this image framed on my wall, but, if I was a loungewear person, I would sure as hell wear it, too.

13. MAC Snow Ball Mini Lipstick Kit, £85
Because who *doesn’t* love mini versions of things *and lipstick?

 

14. Chicchi di Caffe Tin, £15.95
For your coffee and chocolate loving friend. As a baker, I’d intend these to be used for decorating coffee cake, but would no doubt eat the whole tin long before getting round to that.

15. Nine and a half weeks book, £8.59
I suspect this is out of print, given that it only really seems to be available on eBay or on secondhand book sites, but I swear it’s one of the most erotic things I’ve ever read, and so much hotter than the film. Give it to someone special on Christmas Eve and have an early night…

16. Map print, $22
Archie’s Press make beautifully minimalist map prints and best of all, they have loads and loads of different cities available. Good for friends, lovers, or anyone who’s tricky to buy for…

17. The Christmas Chronicles: Notes, Stories & 100 Essential Recipes for Midwinter, £16.61
‘We all know winter. The mysterious whiff of jasmine or narcissus caught in the cold air, the sadness of spent and blackened fireworks the morning after Bonfire Night, a row of pumpkins on a frosted allotment spied from a train window, the magical alchemy of frost and smoke. Winter is the smell of freshly cut ivy or yew and the childish excitement of finding that first, crisp layer of fine ice on a puddle. It is a freckling of snow on cobbled pavements and the golden light from a window on a dark evening that glows like a Russian icon on a museum wall.’
Oh, Nigel.
Buy this for the prose, as much as for the recipes – it’s a masterclass in good writing.

18. Sex & Jasmine Eau de Parfum, $75 CAD
‘Sex & Jasmine…..unfff. The intoxicating aroma of swollen jasmine blooms linger over silken vanilla sheets. The midnight sweat has half erased our floral masks and we collapse, panting triumphant into our animal selves.’
I accept this company could write better, subtler copy. I accept that jasmine isn’t for everyone. But I bought this perfume, which also has notes of vanilla and ambergris, from a craft fair in Brooklyn earlier this year and I promise it really does smell super sexy.

Stand with Planned Parenthood tote bag, $15
25% of the proceeds from these goes straight to Planned Parenthood and I’ve never had so many women say ‘Oh, I love that!’ about any other bag I’ve owned.

20. Essie Nail Polish Advent Calendar, £50
The purpose of advent calendars is not to give them *on Christmas Day*, I get that. I’ll make an exception for this one, though, because Essie polish is high quality, has a fabulous colour range and superb names. Plus, you could open all the windows at once and challenge your family to a festive #Polished competition.

21. Net of satsumas, £3.95
Because what kind of spoilsport would put actual fruit in a stocking?

22. For Men Who Moisturise Christmas Wash Bag 2017, £50
One of the things I love about Liberty is the way they combine classic/traditional design with cutting edge products, especially when it comes to beauty. I’d gladly buy any of these kits, but try this one if you’re buying for a woman.

23. Pull along lobster wooden toy, £14.99
Is it legit to have a baby just so you can buy them a wooden lobster on wheels?

24. Aubade Extrait De Flirt Half Cup Bra, £71
I’m a big fan of the sexiness of sheer underwear, but as sod’s law would have it, all the good stuff doesn’t come in my size. Please buy this for someone and let me live through them vicariously.

25. City Walks Deck: London, £9.95
Great for someone who loves a project, working your way though these over a year of Sundays and following up with a pub roast seems to me like an ideal way to spend time.

26. Budding monogram ornament, £10
Anthropologie has great tree decorations this year. If floral isn’t your (or their) thing, why not get them this super-festive prawn kebab.

27. 3 metre charging cable with weighted knot, £36.99
Know someone who’s sick of constantly having to pick the end of their iphone cable up off the floor? They need this.

28. Lehmann Oblique 40 wine glasses (Set of six), £86.50
Okay, nobody *needs* mouth-blown wineglasses. But lovely glassware is a properly grown-up gift, and although I’d never be able to justify buying these either for me or for anyone else, it doesn’t take away their lustworthiness.

29. Set of Two Conversation Travel Bags, £19.50
Because somewhere to put your dirty knickers when you’re travelling so they don’t get mixed up with the clean ones is the gift you never knew you wanted. Trust me.

30. Small fox cushion, £49.95
No, it’s *not* a stuffed toy, it’s a cushion. And that makes it totally okay to a) buy it for an adult and b) spend almost fifty quid on it, even though it’s just a ‘small’ cushion.

31. Write books not blogs notebook, £15.30
The SBOS gift guide is *always* thirty suggestions, but it also *always* contains a bath oIl and a notebook. When I’d done the full list this year, I realised I’d missed the notebook out, so here it is, as a bonus suggestion no. 31. Buy it for the person who you think blogs in order to put off doing the thing that really scares them.

 

***There’s also usually a charitable cause suggestion as part of the guide. This year, you can send toiletries and make up, even if lightly used, to Caroline Hirons’ excellent Give and Make Up.***

All pictures are taken from sellers’ websites. No copyright infringement is intended. If you’d like a picture removing or crediting, please do get in touch.